Missing Each Other

Edward Brodkin & Ashley Pallathra

Missing Each Other could not have come at a more relevant time given the increased isolation many of us are experiencing with the onset of the coronavirus pandemic. Coupled with the fact that many of us are living fast-paced lives where a majority of our conversations are conducted over a technology platform and distractions are aplenty, many of us are craving interactions where the other person is truly listening, understanding, and connecting with our experiences instead of passively listening. In this book, the authors lay out a framework for achieving "attunement" - or how one can build meaningful connections and be in tune with others, whether they be lifelong friends, partners, or acquaintances you may never meet again. They outline the four pillars of this framework (relaxed awareness, listening, understanding, and mutual responsiveness) as well as short exercises readers can do to practice these skills.

Given that these four pillars are interconnected and differentiating between them can be tough for someone new to the concept of attunement, I thought the authors did an excellent job sharing plenty of examples to help readers conceptualize and understand each of these pillars (as well as some additional related concepts introduced to readers). These examples ranged from the authors' personal experiences to those of professional athletes to the Dalai Lama. I was able to relate these concepts back to my own life including recent conversations I have had over video conferencing where I found that I was not fully attuned and could practice mutual responsiveness in this sort of a setting. It was also interesting to see how my scores on the Attunement Quiz changed as I began to understand these concepts (I took the quiz before reading the book). I am excited to take my learnings from this book and apply it to a real-world setting moving forward! The book is an easy read and is perfect for anyone looking to strengthen their connections with others!